Isobel | February 12, 2016
I’m not bitter. I don’t hate Valentine’s Day. I don’t look at happy couples and sigh miserably. In fact, I quite like Valentine’s Day. When I’m in a relationship, it’s fun and exciting and romantic. Even though it is, in all actuality, a saint’s day rather than a day designed to celebrate couples in love, I have no issue buying heart shaped candy and cutting out my construction paper Valentines. When I’m not in a relationship, I spend the day with my sister watching movies and guilting my dad into buying us candy, so either way the day is pretty fun.
So with that in mind, I reaffirm the title of this blog post: Be your own Valentine, relationship or no. This doesn’t mean that you should cancel your plans or spend the whole day spoiling yourself, although you’re certainly welcome to do so if it suits you. By this I mean that you should love yourself.
You don’t have to reconcile yourself with all of your flaws and insecurities or list reasons why you’re great, but you should take a moment to maybe say it to yourself. I love me. There’s nothing vain or obnoxious about simply loving who you are. Romance and relationships are nice, but at the end of the day the only person you are really going to spend the rest of your life with, without a doubt, is yourself. So offer yourself understanding and compassion as if you were the protagonist of that movie who has made mistakes but earned your love anyway. Forgive yourself for the thing you did at that party or the words you never said or the person you let slip away. Look at yourself as you are and say that that is enough because it is. It has to be. You can change your hair or study more or join a new club and that will undoubtedly change you in some way, but fundamentally you are who you are, so what’s the point of thinking only of what you could be? Accept yourself. Love yourself. If only for a day. You may find that doing it once makes it a little easier for next time.
That’s all I have to say on the matter of Valentine’s Day. Resume purchasing chocolate and writing out your Valentines, and do so without any misconception that this blog post has told you to do otherwise. There’s nothing shameful in fitting the Valentine’s Day mold or ignoring it completely. Only remember that during what is widely considered a celebration of love that you should love yourself first. If you can’t love yourself, how can you expect to love anybody else?